Ideal wedding

I don't even plan to get married, not this soon anyway since i'm currently single and happy. But i remembered when i was with my ex bf, once or twice we discussed about wedding. He wants a normal wedding but simple. I want a direct to the point wedding. Basically, my ideal wedding is family dinner and the 'akad nikah' to make it legitimate. I have a small family while my ex has a big family, so we don't really see eye to eye. To make it more difficult, the family is more traditional and he has a sister who just got married. So a normal typical Malay wedding is a must.

My ideal wedding involved a wedding ring, akad nikah, close family dinner from both sides. Not that i have forgotten my friends but after i am legally married, then i will invite them for dinner as a later celebration.

Why do i want such thing?

1. I don't believe in spending thousands and thousands for a one day occasion which may end up in divorce (i'm not being negative but it's kind of lame and sad when u have an expansive wedding and then in less than 5 years you are divorced?).

2. I really hate to play super dress up. People say you are suppose to look like a princess on your wedding, hence the gowns and the make up. No thank you, i have no intention of becoming a princess even for a day. Believe me or not, i have this thinking when i was 11 years old when i have to attend my dad's wedding to my stepmom.

3. Celebration involved many people. I don't like big celebrations, that's why i don't really attend parties or festival celebrations. I will feel dizzy and disorientated. I will only attend the necessary and important ones and when i have time, example like my friends' wedding.

4. I guess i have seen and heard so many failed marriages or pretentious marriages to really appreciate celebration of marriage.

5. Note however, just because i seem to sound so negative about marriage, doesn't mean i don't love my future partner. If i don't love him, i wouldn't be married to him in the first place. Plus, i think i'm doing him a favour by not letting him spend so much on our wedding. The only costly thing will the wedding ring (coz i'm a fan of jewelery, but not gold :O). Though i want a cheap wedding, it doesn't imply that my partner doesn't have much money. I will only get married when my partner is financially stable and doing well.

For me, a woman should only get married to the man of her dreams if she's ready to be committed to him, he's capable of being committed to her, financially stable and don't have too many debts. Just now i just read an article where an Ah Long threatened a pregnant woman for RM 50 000 because her husband owed them that amount of money. What kind of shitty problem is that? If i'm gonna get married, the man should be reliable and responsible. Yes, i have high expectations in a man because i'm not blinded by love. I rather be alone than be with someone who's going to burden me with more problems of his own because i have my own problems to deal with. another problem with men is that they never share their problems with their spouse. They keep it to themselves until things got out if control, like the fact that he took loan to pay off his debts. you can take loan but if you take the illegal loans, then you'll be in trouble. I believe that when you are married, you need to discuss any decision you plan to make with your partner.

There's nothing wrong if people want big wedding celebrations, especially if they can afford it. Different people have different priorities. Mine may be different, but i'm sticking to mine despite it being unconventional. Further, it's fun to have a small quite unknown wedding, people probably think that you got pregnant out of wedlock and that's why you are keeping your wedding small, simple and hush hush. People will think what they want to think.

Though marriage to me may be cheap, the bigger problem that a guy may face with me is that i'm difficult to be dealt with :$. Well, nothing is perfect!